Authors, Writers, Publishers, and Book Readers
A little feedback would be appreciated.
Water
Roars down the mountian
Always to the sea
The mother of creation
Flows wild and free
Rises to the heavens
Floats upon a breeze
Falls as a gift of life
Soaks the grass and trees
When the need is pressing
Comes to save the day
Sometimes with great violence
Washes all away
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Comment by JB Sullivan on July 17, 2011 at 4:53pm
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Keith, its fine. The beat is solid. Makes a good mini-story too. I got a bit tongue tied on "Falls as a gift of life" as the words are closely former but otherwise, I enjoyed it. Hope this helps. :)
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*FORMED ~ sorry/ typo.
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Comment by Pritha Chattopadhyay on July 19, 2011 at 11:53am
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Simple, genuine and rhythmic... liked it
Comment
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