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Surrounded by vultures, death resinates; evil impersonates within imprisoned inmates
Mind control like mk ultra;oh the devil bought ya
A brand new car, two faced wife, and the knife used to slice your own wrist

Your smile hides the lies, cries n dirty trials and tribulations; insane if you remain expecting gods mercy
Thirsty people will steal your drink,(wink wink) ... sip away until bone dry
Now dehydrated everybody's gone and defiantly not sharing a drop
To top it off, they sit in there loft laughing at my pain;sitting atop there high horse, forgetting a fall will paralyze even superman

Ignorance is self imprisonment, with no attempt or care to even believe/see;
Big house, money, lust all just dressing up the rusted bars
Morals shot in veins, pain sold in vials, sex traded for companionship ;lives taken for a budget, because the judges kids need two iPods each

We need to expand humanity as a race ;share your plate instead of flaunting your rate of income
Money is controlling us because we allow this, it is still only paper
A way for government to stay in control which without poor there is no rich
So work all day for pay that isn't enough; while rich s*** out millions just for fun
This is more then dumb, politician drops 40 sum million for election

While thousands are broke, this has to be joke; why the f*** are we not rebuilding every project
Feeding every child subjected to theft of life; give us nothing and act like we wrong for wanting something

Now maybe you see why I'm mad, why it's hard to smile and act glad
With only crumbs left in the bag, toe tags administered at birth
WHATS OUR LIFE REALLY WORTH??

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Replies to This Discussion

Jonathon, I like this poem about "Think Bigger."  Beginning line is a grabber: "Surrounded by vultures, death resonantes ..."  (Think you mispell words on purpose, for a reason.)  Giggled reading about the judges kids needing 2 ipods each.  However, in the 4th verse (though I loved the 1st line), you could have done without some of the sentences or words.  You can rewrite them in a way that would convey your message but still be poetic.  I'll call them vampires.  You ended the poem real nicely--"With only crumbs left in the bag, toe tags administered at birth ..."  The "toe tags," I refer to as a MARKERS placed on some of us at birth.  Good poem but could be a little more subtle.

Hey, thanks much for reading and commenting!! I haven't been on here much lately, due to work. But yeah I agree, think this should be revised and written more fluently and poetic. Removing the unnecessary words/lines. This was also written awhile back, and feel like my newer pieces are much more well put together. I'll try to get some of my newer writings up asap. Once again thanks for the tips and just reading in general.

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