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I write to keep the memory of Tommy alive, to never be forgotten. Tommy was my only child, my son.
Tommy died May 29, 2010 on a Saturday evening ... he and his family had gone to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina to spend a week. It was their summer vacation, they were happy, excited to be going to the beach. Tommy was especially excited to be going to play with his little three year old son, Taban... for the first time at the beach.
Tommy wasn't going to go with his family at first... 'something changed his mind at the last minute'... he became excited, happy about playing with Taban at the beach. He was very animated while telling me, his mother, what they were going to do. His eyes were shining, smiling... happy. He was beautiful that evening....
I've seen that 'beautiful look' many times in the past... just 'before'... As I write, you will see what I mean. Also... there's a 'soft, velvety look' that I see sometimes, 'just before'. This is for another time when writing...
They made it to their destination safely. Shortly thereafter....Tommy and Taban disappeared... they slipped down to the beach without telling anyone. I wonder 'if Tommy knew somehow'?
He did just what he wanted so much to do, so looking forward to do. He ran, played, laughed, squealed with joy, playing with Taban. He was sending photos to my home computer 200 miles away. He was doing a video of Taban as his fingers slipped off the cellphone camera....
Taban was sitting on the sand watching the water come close to his feet. I 'know' that was Tommy's last thing he saw... little Taban through the viewfinder. Maybe he looked at him as he... collapsed to the sand... not knowing he was 'leaving. He didn't have time to think, nor to feel pain.
As Tommy's mother, I 'feel deeply'... that Tommy 'knew, felt' something just before he decided out of the blue... to go on that vacation. 'Something' prompted him to go... no one has mentioned any kind of feelings, premonitions he might have had. All I saw the evening before was 'pure happiness to be going to play with Taban'...... and the 'beautiful look'.
Tommy had a heart attack at age 40... the autopsy showed two complete blockages in his heart. No one knew he was sick physically... he was experiencing emotional turmoil that disquised any symptoms he might have shown.
I write another blog ... happycolorsandgrannygee.blogspot.com ... you are welcomed to visit it to see photos of Tommy, of us. You are welcomed to follow there, also.
Below, you will see what I wrote about Tommy:
My Son, Tommy, has gone to Heaven now...