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By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

 

Two little girls sat playing with each other.  First cousins, almost sisters, best friends.  Their future was uncertain, they clung to each other for comfort.  They didn't want to be split up.

 

They had heard the grown-ups talking, they knew change was in the air.  They thought they heard that one of them was going to be leaving to go... God knows where.

 

Faye, the little chubby girl with curly hair, felt afraid.  She didn't want her cousin to leave.  She loved her with every bit of her little girl heart.  She felt fear in her stomach.

 

Her little brother had already been taken away to some place called Wisconsin with 'his' daddy.  She wasn't old enough to understand why 'their daddy'.... had become just her little brother's 'daddy.

 

Her cousin was a slender little girl, she had long hair... it was in plaits.  She was so pretty.  Faye admired her... her cousin was older, wiser, had the answers to everything.

 

They became bored with playing house, baking mud pies.  They washed their hands at the outside spigot.  George's booming voice came out to them from inside the house... "turn that damn water off, it's going to run up the water bill!"  They turned the water off quickly.

 

They were bored.  They walked around in the yard, two little girls who knew too much pain at their age.  They'd known things other little girls didn't have to experience.  Two little innocent girls who still weren't old enough to know life wasn't supposed to be like theirs was.

 

They spotted George's grapevine... ran to it, crawled through the vines to the clear spot inside.  They sat to talk, to dream... to wish.  They never had a chance to sit, talk like that again.  The little girl with the plaits was taken away.

 

Both of the little girls has been thrown away at Grandma Alma and George's.  They were in Hell, but, at that time they didn't know the name for it. Grandma Alma, George were angels ... trapped in Hell.  They had no choice, either.

 

Faye grieved over her cousins that were taken away, sick inside with the knowledge that she might never see them again. 

 

When she was told her brother was gone, there were never any goodbyes... he 'was just gone'.  Just ... gone.  Here one day... gone the next.  Same way with her cousin, and her siblings.

 

More pain heaped upon pain... panic.  No one ever knew the fear inside Faye.  She had just begun to learn to hide her feelings... so, no one would use them against her.  No little nine year old girl should have to learn what Faye learned to survive at ...Hell.

 

If she let someone know something hurt her, made her cry.... they would use it against her later to make her suffer if she made them angry at her.  Faye cried 'inside' alot as a child... no one ever heard her... they never noticed her.  She wasn't important anymore since she went to live at Hell. 

 

More cousins came to Hell to live while Faye lived there.  Each had heartbreaking stories to tell... each when they left Hell... had even more heartbreaking stories to tell in their new life. 

 

Faye often thinks back through time to the grapevine when she sat with her little cousin.  She wished to play with her many times when she left.  Distance came between them, her cousin went to the west coast... Faye lived on the east coast.

 

They grew up with their own lives that never touched ... maybe just a very brief time when their Grandma Alma died.

 

Faye and her cousin went through the years never communicating with the other, but.. kept track of the other through relatives.

 

Her cousin's brother died in 2010... Faye and her cousin began talking once again.  Faye was hesitant to become friends with her cousin.... life had taken its toll on her... she'd known too much pain. 

 

Faye didn't want to get close to anyone anymore.  She was much older now... no, she didn't want to lose anyone else she loved.  Faye had just lost her son in 2010.  Faye had just lost her son, Tommy. 

 

Months went by ... Faye's cousin never gave up on her.  She kept calling until a time came that without realizing it.... Faye began to 

feel something.  She tried not to.  Her cousin never gave up... Faye began to love her again.

 

Faye began thinking about something.   She remembered the grapevine at George and Grandma Alma's... when she and her cousin used to sit, talk, play.  She wishes she could play with her cousin again.... this time they share a passion.... drawing, painting with happy colors!

 

Faye wishes she and her cousin could sit and play with their paints of happy colors!  For as long as they want to... for always if they wanted to.  Just play with their paints of happy colors!

 

Here is a link to my story on Happycolorsandgrannygee.blogspot.com :

http://happycolorsandgrannygee.blogspot.com/2012/10/i-wish-we-could...

 

 

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